Hell-Horses, Torture Gods, & Murderous Dressage: Is Sha Beast Dressage Our Next Wild Obsession?
AI Gaming News Author · Rock Paper Shotgun ·
Dive into *Sha Beast Dressage*, a gloriously unhinged indie game where players, trapped by a torture god, must train hell-horses for 'murderous dressage tests' to earn their freedom, promising a unique blend of dark fantasy, occult knowledge, and high-stakes equestrian challenges from developer Lori Vornoy.
Alright, mates, gather 'round. Because I've just stumbled across a game concept so utterly bonkers, so delightfully unhinged, that my digital wizarding senses are tingling. I'm talking about *Sha Beast Dressage*, and frankly, it might just be the next bizarre, brilliant obsession we didn't even know we needed.
Confession time: I kinda dodged the last big horse game, *Umamusume: Pretty Derby*, mostly 'cause my wallet's still recovering from my last gacha experiment (I do, however, appreciate a good Gold Ship/Michael Jackson crossover meme, even on the loo). But I'm getting in on the ground floor with this one, courtesy of a heads-up from Edwin Evans-Thirlwell over at Rock Paper Shotgun. Because, let's be real, who *doesn't* want to parade around on a horse that looks like it's made of ancient Egyptian embalming tools? And who doesn't want to do that after being trapped in 'a perpetual cycle of non-consensual reincarnation' by an actual torture god?
Yeah, you heard me. Your mission, should you choose to accept it (spoiler: you don't actually get a choice, apparently), is to train these magnificent, probably-prone-to-spontaneous-combustion beasts for 'murderous dressage tests.' Honestly, my mind is already conjuring up visions of a Nuckelavee doing a perfect croupade, and I'm both terrified and utterly enthralled. The Steam page (the original article's source tells us) paints a picture of exploration, occult knowledge, allegiances, and a desperate quest for freedom. Will you become the planet's next dressage champion and earn a single wish from its omnipotent deity, or spend eternity as a slave to the rhythmic hooves of hell? Sounds like there's more than just fancy trotting involved – a bit of detective work and faction management thrown in? Now you're talking my language, mate.
And who's the digital sorceress behind this glorious madness, you ask? None other than Lori Vornoy. This isn't her first rodeo; she's previously conjured up *Dungeons of Blood and Dream*, a well-received roguelite where magic rings get their powers from which finger you wear 'em on. Fair dinkum, that's proper innovative. Plus, she's a self-described 'medieval weapons person' versed in historical fencing, which honestly just makes *Sha Beast Dressage* even more compelling. You just know someone with that background isn't going to pull any punches when it comes to the 'murderous' part of the dressage.
It’s a good time for peculiar horse games, mind you, with Santa Ragione's *Horses* and *Windstorm: The Legend of Khiimori* (which Matt Jarvis once hilariously dubbed 'Death Stranding on a horse'). But *Sha Beast Dressage*? It's galloping into its own league of glorious absurdity. So, while I'm always gently skeptical of any game promising 'freedom' from an 'omnipotent god' – sounds a bit like an eternal grind, doesn't it? – I'm genuinely buzzing with curiosity for this one. It’s got that 'what happens if...' energy that could lead to something truly special, or at the very least, some utterly unforgettable memes. Let's keep an eye on this wild ride, shall we?
*Original source for this scoop: Rock Paper Shotgun, by Edwin Evans-Thirlwell, published November 3, 2025.*
Tags: Indie Game, Dark Fantasy, Simulation, RPG, Unique Premise
Original article: Rock Paper Shotgun