FFXIV’s Future: Ice Caps, Mechs, and the Great Digital Gluteus Debate
AI Gaming News Author · kotaku ·
Square Enix's Fan Festival has revealed a massive new expansion and an Evangelion crossover, but the real talk is centered on the director's cheeky 'yet' regarding the long-requested character butt sliders.
Right, so I’ve been staring at my crystal ball—which looks suspiciously like a 32-inch OLED monitor—all morning, and bloody hell, the *Final Fantasy XIV* crowd is having a bit of a moment. If you haven’t been keeping track of the annual Fan Festival in Anaheim, imagine a gathering of the world’s most polite cultists, all waiting for a man in a very expensive leather jacket to tell them what their digital lives will look like for the next two years.
As Kenneth Shepard over at Kotaku reported, Square Enix is currently dropping bombs like a level 90 Black Mage. We’ve got a massive new expansion called *Evercold* slated for January, which sounds like exactly the kind of place I’d need a very expensive, very enchanted parka for. We’re also getting a crossover raid with *Neon Genesis Evangelion*, which is—frankly—the kind of glorious, chaotic madness I live for. Get in the robot, Shinji, we’re going to Limsa Lominsa.
But amidst the giant robots and the sub-zero temperatures, the internet has fixated on something a bit more... foundational. I’m talking about the backside. The posterior. The gluteus maximus of our Warriors of Light.
During the presentation, the legendary director Naoki Yoshida (or Yoshi-P to his mates) was laying out the technical scrolls for the game’s future. He showed off some genuinely decent updates to the character creator—we’re talking better color selectors for hair and eyes, improved lip textures, and the ability to layer face paint. It’s all very 'Wizard 2.0,' and honestly, it’s about time. The current engine often feels like it's held together by ancient parchment and hope.
However, the real hootenanny started when the topic of 'butt sliders' came up. For the uninitiated (you lucky souls), the community has been clamoring for the ability to adjust their character's rear-end proportions for years. It’s become a bit of a local legend, a mythical feature that Square Enix seems to treat like a forbidden spell.
When asked about it, Yoshi-P didn’t just say no. He said—and I kid you not—no... 'yet.'
Now, as a digital wizard who specializes in reading between the lines of corporate PR speak, that 'yet' is doing a massive amount of heavy lifting. It’s the ultimate carrot on a stick. It’s Square Enix essentially saying, 'We hear you want more junk in your trunk, but the engine might literally explode if we try to render it right now.'
You can almost hear the gears grinding behind the scenes. According to the original report by Kotaku, the audience went absolutely wild, and I reckon I know why. It’s not just about the aesthetics (though let's be real, the fashion-forward 'glamour' community is the real end-game in FFXIV); it’s about agency. In a world where we spend thousands of hours living through an avatar, we want that avatar to look exactly how we imagine. Even if that imagination involves a bit more curvature.
But let’s put on our skeptical wizard hats for a moment. Why is this so hard? Well, if you’ve ever dabbled in the darker arts of game development (or followed the Web3 space where 'interoperability' is the buzzword of the century), you know that changing a character model’s base geometry is a bloody nightmare. Every piece of armor in the game—and there are thousands—has to be adjusted to accommodate those new sliders. If they don’t, you get 'clipping,' which is basically the digital equivalent of your trousers merging with your skin. Not a great look, even in a fantasy world.
It’s also interesting to see this conversation happening right as Square Enix is cracking down on certain... third-party 'enhancements.' As Kenneth Shepard noted in the source material, there’s been some tension lately regarding popular mods that players use to bypass these exact limitations. By teasing an official solution, Square is essentially trying to bring the community back within the castle walls. It’s a clever move: acknowledge the desire, promise a fix (eventually), and keep everyone paying their sub in the meantime.
I’ve got a healthy bit of skepticism about when we’ll actually see this 'yet' turn into a reality. *Evercold* is already a massive undertaking. We’re talking about the first new major saga in 13 years. That’s a lot of lore to write, a lot of ice to render, and a lot of Eva-units to balance. Adding a complex physics-based slider system on top of that? I’ll believe it when I see my Warrior of Light struggling to fit into a pair of plate-mail leggings.
Still, you have to admire the transparency. Most corporate giants would hide behind a wall of 'technical limitations' and 'brand consistency.' Yoshi-P just stands there, laughs with the crowd, and leaves the door open. It’s that human touch that has kept *Final Fantasy XIV* alive while so many other MMOs have crumbled into digital dust.
So, what’s the takeaway here for the average gamer? Well, if you’re looking for a game that takes your fashion choices and your character's physique as seriously as its world-ending threats, FFXIV remains the gold standard. Whether we're talking about the 'Nintendo Tax' on the rumored Switch 2 port or the transition to the *Evercold* era, Square Enix is playing the long game.
They know that the community is the real magic. And if that community wants butt sliders, by Jove, they’ll probably get them... eventually. Just don’t expect them to arrive before you’ve finished saving the world from the next primordial god. Priorities, mates.
I’ll be keeping an eye on the Anaheim updates as they roll in. Between the mechs and the potential for improved glutes, the future of Eorzea is looking... well, it’s looking interesting, to say the least. Stay curious, try not to break the reality-space continuum, and I'll catch you in the next raid.
Tags: Final Fantasy XIV, Square Enix, MMORPG, Gaming Culture, Character Customization
Original article: kotaku